Welcome to the Birman Brothers Blog!
Hello. We are the Birman Brothers. This is me, Trumpet and that is Cookie Monster. We love eggs and meat but we can also eat biscuits. We run, jump, fight and write limmericks. Every day at 4.30pm we help feed the ducks and chickens and rabbits. Not to be immodest but clearly our personal attributes eminently qualify us for the position of Boss of all the Small Animals which includes checking our minions every day, protecting our borders and writing a weekly blog about our board meetings, new rules we just make up, sleep-ins we manage and protests I, Trumpet organise.
Limerick 15031 ‘Protest 1 – Inside!’
There is a cute cat called Trumpet
And brother, a steadfast duet.
Our aim is to design
A cat flap that leads inside
So we too enjoy the benefets!
No time for protesting this week. Tasting and analysing menu dishes is a very serious job. Our favourite thing is eating and when it comes to our food bowls, it doesn’t get a lot more serious. My favourite is eel and salmon. And duck (sorry ducks). And also venison and chicken (ditto chickens). Also rabbit and lamb. We also love Highlander (meow!). Quail eggs are just the right size for my stomach. And we love love love salmon pearls. Cookie Monster and I have been in food heaven this week. Its true what is said, the way to this kittens heart is through his stomach.
There is a mean woman named Em
Refusing to let little kittens in 🙁
At night it is dark
sometimes cold, exclamation mark
What kinda person doesn’t melt at this vis-ion.
A WEEK OF LANDSCAPING
Everyone is too tired for protests. I really like Em’s big paw-thing. She digs such big holes. We’re just kittens so… I sat in one hole and dug it deeper. Cookie Monster got stuck in the drain. Thanks to Jimmy who saved him. I helped Gary’s digger mark out some paths. Cookie Monster made a toy from a ball of soil. We love all the digging and so do the spring birds. The duckies found the East Garden today. They are so adventuresome. Cookie Monster still eats their food.
Mrs Brown, Eider and Daph
With the Birman Bros enjoyed a laugh
Grace, Cezanne, Hortense
And ‘ukawai Herbes de Provence
In a ‘Gourmet Magazine’ photograph
Cookie Monster and I were given food that made me distrust my humans. It was some cheap generic mass produced and likely not organic or free range stuff that I suspect carried a warning not to feed to Birmans. Now I have to check everything before I eat. And also the Ducks have discovered where Em lives but, how come just because they make a lot of noise, she feeds them. ALL THE TIME. And, it doesn’t seem to matter how much noise I, Trumpet Boss make! Things have to change. Today, instead of sitting nicely and charming Em, I decided to take the ducks raucous approach and…it worked. yay!
Limerick 7529 – Something Lovely
There is a nice Lodge Hukawai, in
Franz Josef, South Westland, New Zealand.
Me and Cookie agree
The Lake, Gardens, plants and trees
And animals make our home most beguiling.
Never a dull moment. A family of possums have been fighting Cookie Monster over the right to not just illegally take up residence but invite themselves to eat our dinner and to bear arms (claws, larger body mass and bush experience), we’re just kittens. Every time Cookie Monster is attacked Em comes out to rescue him and sort out the possums. Their names are Pearly, Porgy and Possumine and they are very determined. They were.
Limerick 53986 – Border Dispute
Pearly, Possumine and Porgy
Attempted to squat in our territory
Every night dressed in brown
From the Lodge roof they’d climb down
Now condemned to explore the shades of purgatory.
PROTEST – NO MORE BISCUITS! NO MORE POSSUMSES!
Not even the flash biscuits from the vets. We want meat! And fish! And greek style yoghurt! And raw eggs. Because we love them best of all. We like to go walking with Em every night along the lake. Its just kittens and Em. We are still catching pesky possumses!
Limerick 475 – Pesky Possumses!
Three possums invaded our territory
Nightly climbing from their roof eyrie
They’d help themselves to our food
Ignite a retaliatory blood feud
And pollute our calm haven with snarls and dyssentery.
PROTEST – DREAMING OF A BEAUTIFUL BED
This week we kittens lead by me Trumpet, protested our living quarters. How come Em gets to live inside the Lodge and has a really lovely bed and we little kittens have to live outside in a cardboard box? Even though it is lined with a very nice baby lambskin on top of a memory foam mattress. But we are growing up and need a much bigger bed!
Limerick 50987 – We dream of a beautiful bed
Oh for a cat box roomy, airy and clean
From which to watch our world unfold scene by scene
To stretch from whiskers to claw
Both myself and Cookie Mon-stor
On feathers and lambswool, Hea-ven(e)!